Come Pour the Wine Page 21

  “Thanks,” Kit said, instantly extracting a dozen snapshots from her evening purse. She had brought them deliberately, knowing what a yawn it would be once Betsy got started on her own children.

  After viewing a few, Betsy lost interest, as if Kit’s children were the product of a mere amateur in the motherhood game. “They’re very sweet … Pardon me, I want to say hello to …”

  “Be my guest,” Kit said under her breath as Betsy drifted away.

  When dinner was announced and everyone took their places, Janet sat at one end of the long table, looking from her guests to her husband at the opposite end. It was a sight to be remembered, the two families united, her best friends together …

  Bill opened the festivities. “This is to my wife, who’s made me—I confess—the happiest man in the world.” He got up, walked down to Janet and handed her a small box from his pocket.

  When Janet took off the wrappings and opened the box she almost fainted. Inside was a ring with a ten-carat square-cut gem. As Bill slipped it on the ring finger of her right hand she glanced at her wide gold wedding band. Of the two rings the band was still the more beautiful—to her, anyway—and the dazzling jeweled ring was but a small part of all Bill had given her.

  “You like it?”

  She was almost speechless, but managed “… I love it … you most of all.”

  Violet was looking distinctly uncomfortable during this exchange, which wasn’t lost on Kit. The Queen Mother had been dethroned. Sad woman. Children were just on loan. Enjoy them while you can, she thought.

  Harriet’s thoughts ran parallel to Kit’s at that moment. But what her mother was feeling now was nothing to what Harriet and Gordon were putting up with living in that big house with her, hearing the same complaints from mama over and over. And over. “I didn’t shut my eyes last night. Do you think Janet is deliberately keeping Bill away? Sometimes I wonder … since he got married …” And it went on and on. Harriet knew if it weren’t for Janet, Bill wouldn’t call even as infrequently as he did….

  When dessert was cleared away, Janet got up from her chair and faced her guests, her eyes sparkling. “This is just the happiest birthday of my life. And I can’t imagine a better time to announce … that Mr. and Mrs. McNeil are going to have a baby.”

  Ignoring the cheers and customary huzzahs, Bill got up, went over to her and kissed her soundly. “You held out on me, lady.”

  She gave him an arch smile. “Not really … only on the announcement….”

  And later that night, lying in bed beside her … “How long have you known? I mean how far along are you?”

  “One month.”

  “By God, I didn’t know I was that good. Must have taken the first time.”

  “Some man,” she said, winked and pulled herself on top of him.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  AS THE MONTHS WENT by, Bill watched the changes in Janet as though observing a miracle in the making. The more she showed, the prouder he became.

  When he arrived home one evening from the office to find her in a maternity dress, he whooped, turned her round and round. “That’s the best-looking thing I’ve ever seen you in.”

  “You really think so, do you?”

  “You bet.” He put his hand under the tunic. “Here, let me feel that little guy—”

  “It could be a girl.”

  “Maybe … but remember my virility … just one time and—”

  “And aren’t you lucky I wasn’t that fertile before? It does take two, you know.”

  “I know, and I also know we’re going to celebrate.”

  “But I cooked—”

  “Put it away. I want to show off my son’s mother.”

  When Janet was going into her sixth month, they began looking for a place to live. The apartment was out of the question, but nothing they saw really suited them. Bill was getting quite upset about it but Janet kept trying to appease him, telling him something would be available soon, that it wasn’t all that crucial.

  On a crisp Sunday in November they drove out to Long Island to spend the day with his family. Janet loved this time of the year, with the trees displaying their fall colors. Living in the country … but she knew Bill would never move from the city, so she pushed the thought down, didn’t mention it.

  As they sat in the living room after lunch and watched the fire glow, her eyes wandered beyond the French doors to the garden, where Gordon and Bill were taking a stroll.

  “You look a little sad, Janet,” Harriet said.

  “No, not really, I was just thinking how beautiful the country is in the fall.”

  For a moment Harriet remembered the house she had given up to come and live here. “It is lovely, isn’t it? By the way, how’s your house hunting going?”

  “We’re having trouble finding something we like.”

  “Really?” Violet asked, and the wheels in her head started turning. “What are you going to do if you don’t find a place soon?”

  “I don’t know. Make do until—”

  “Ridiculous. You can’t bring a baby home to Bill’s bachelor apartment. One bedroom, one bath … that’s nonsense with all the space here.”

  Janet quickly wished the subject had never come up, while Harriet was beginning to wonder if Bill’s marriage might give her a reprieve.

  “It’s sweet of you to offer, mother, but Bill wouldn’t like commuting,” Janet said, knowing that was only part of the truth.

  “Nonsense. He did it before and never complained—”

  “Complained about what, mother?” Bill said as he and Gordon came into the room.

  “Commuting.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I was saying you never minded commuting to the city when you lived here.”

  “Yes?”

  “Well, Janet was telling me what a difficult time you’re having finding a place—”

  “And?”

  “I suggested that you come out here and live. My word, there’s enough room for six.”

  Long pause. “Thank you, mother, we appreciate it … but every woman needs her own home—”

  “Every woman, Bill?” Harriet’s tone was light but she gave him a sharp look.

  “Well, I guess it’s different with you—”

  “Yes, sure, I know what you mean. Oh, the joy of being so free, with no family to tie one down.”

  He wished he could crawl into a hole. Harriet had saved his life and now, thanks to him, she was in a tight spot. A spot called mother …

  “Tell you what. This summer we’ll bring the baby out and stay so you and Gordon can take a long vacation.”

  “You’ve got it all arranged. How nice. But I suggest you check with Janet first, dear brother …”

  He looked to Janet for her reaction.

  “Yes, it sounds … just fine,” she said slowly, knowing the conflict Bill was feeling. Not to mention herself …

  Violet’s eyes became extra bright.

  “This is wonderful news … to have my son’s baby right in this house … that is, yours and his, Janet … Well, now that that’s settled, let’s all go in to dinner.”

  Bill hounded every real estate office in the city with new determination, but the houses they saw were either too old and run-down or too new and boxy, with rooms the size of telephone booths. The one he did like wasn’t for sale, but it could be leased for six months. He didn’t, though, much like the notion of moving around, so that was out. He wanted a permanent place. His place.

  And now it was getting down to post time, so to speak. It was February and Janet was in the middle of her eighth month.

  “I don’t know what to do, honey—”

  “Suppose we buy that one on West Ninety-fifth—”

  “I hate it.”

  “But if we remodel it could be—”

  “A crummy old house remodeled. It’s dark, no view … nothing. Just a lot of money down the drain.”

  “Then I guess the only thing to do is s
tay here until something comes up.”

  Lousy way to bring home a new baby, he thought. The nursery furniture couldn’t be delivered because they had nowhere to put it. And the layette was stacked in its original boxes … “How can we manage with a nurse and all?”

  “The nurse will be here only two weeks and she can sleep in the living room.”

  “And where will the baby sleep, in the bathroom?”

  Janet laughed. It seemed he was taking it much more seriously than she was.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “You. The baby will sleep in the living room until the nurse leaves, then we’ll move the bassinet into the bedroom and …”

  Not much of a solution, Bill thought. But …

  Janet looked at the clock on the nightstand. It was five in the morning and the pains had been coming at ten-minute intervals since three-thirty. She shook Bill gently awake.

  “Darling … I think it’s time—”

  He bolted up in bed. “You mean it’s started?”

  Jumping out of bed, he started to dress in a rush, his hands fumbling at the buttons on his shirt.

  Janet lay back watching, amused. Bill was having labor pains.

  He groped in the closet for her fur coat. “Okay, let’s go—”

  “Not until you kiss me.”

  He gave her a quick, apprehensive kiss, then helped her out of bed.

  “Bill, let’s have a cup of coffee before we go.”

  His mouth fell open. “Are you having labor pains or were you just kidding?”

  “I am and I wasn’t, but it’s not that bad—”

  “Then get into this coat right now or I’ll have a nervous breakdown.”

  He called downstairs to have his car brought around.

  “Okay. Is there anything we forgot?” he said, glancing nervously around the room.

  “Yes, call my mother and yours.”

  “No … not my mother—”

  “I promised. She wants to be at the hospital when the baby’s—”

  “I’ll call her later.”

  “No, Bill. I want you to let her know now. I promised.”

  “Okay, when I get to the hospital.”

  Janet’s cheerfulness did nothing to set aside his fears, and not even Janet’s mother was able to calm him when she joined him at the hospital. Mrs. Stevens had been staying at the Plaza Hotel for the last two weeks, coming to their apartment every day to relieve Janet of cooking and household chores. Now she kept reassuring him that Janet was just fine. She’d gone through her pregnancy with a minimum of discomfort and that was the best sign of all.

  It still didn’t help and he kept right on pacing the corridor.

  Violet made her entrance at ten, with Harriet and Gordon. Bill found his mother’s presence was only an irritation. Hardly a relief.

  “Now, son, you’ve got to calm down. Having a baby is the most natural thing in the world. I went through four births. Of course, yours was the most—”

  Bill was walking away down the hall before she could finish. He didn’t want to be reminded now of all times how much she’d suffered bringing him into the world. Not, for God’s sake, this morning.

  He went into Janet’s room for the umpteenth time and held her hand. “You all right, darling?”

  Although the pains were coming more frequently, she managed a thin smile.

  “Fine, dear … fine …”

  The nurse spared him the ordeal of seeing Janet during the worst of her contractions by asking him to leave.

  At eleven o’clock the doctor came out of Janet’s room and told Bill she was ready to be taken to delivery.

  “Is everything all right?”

  “Everything is going along smoothly. A first baby for someone as small as your wife can be difficult, but she doesn’t appear to be having any problems at all.”

  He walked alongside Janet as she was wheeled down the hall, and when they reached the wide surgery doors he bent down and kissed her. With the doors swinging closed behind her, he stood praying everything would go all right. He couldn’t manage a smile when Martha Stevens took his hand and gave it a sympathetic squeeze.

  Violet sat twisting her handkerchief and remembering how she had suffered at Bill’s birth. Six hours for a first child was nothing compared to the twenty it had taken to bring Bill into the world … Well, Janet was a young girl … midwestern stock … and today’s methods were different….

  At twelve-thirty the doctor came out, looked at Bill, then broke into a smile. “Congratulations. You’re the father of a seven-pound baby girl.”

  “A girl?” But the disappointment was short-lived in the excitement of the moment.

  “And Janet?”

  “Like a pro … about the best patient I ever had.”

  When he was finally allowed to see Janet, he stood at the side of her bed, holding her hand and looking at her as though she were somehow sainted.

  She looked at him, realizing he had gone through an ordeal almost as great as hers.

  “It really wasn’t all that bad, darling. Look what we’ve got for our few labor pains. Did you see her? Isn’t she adorable?”

  That adorable little baby actually looked like a red lobster. “She’s just … beautiful.”

  Janet smiled, knowing he had never seen a newborn baby before and that he was disappointed at not having a son. But he’d feel differently in a few days.

  “Darling, will you call Kit?”

  He didn’t think he was up to doing anything right now, but he reached for the phone by her bed and dialed.

  Kit let out a war whoop. “Janet got her little girl.” He glanced at Janet as he answered Kit’s barrage of questions. Odd, he thought. Janet had never said anything to him about wanting a girl. They were so sure it would be … oh, well.

  When he went out into the corridor to give Mrs. Stevens a moment with Janet, his mother pulled him aside and spoke to him in a confidential tone. “Bill, I’ve given this a lot of thought. Since you’re my only son I think it’s appropriate that family names be handed down to your children. If you’d had a boy it would have been Jason, but since it’s a girl, why not Violet? I’d be so proud …”

  Bill flinched, annoyed at her intrusion and yet also realizing that she thought she’d just offered him some sort of honor … But one thing was for sure. If there was one name he could not stand it was “Violet.” “Mother, we never discussed girls’ names … and besides, I’m afraid it would probably hurt Janet’s mother’s feelings. I’ll talk to Janet about this.” And that he did immediately.

  As soon as Mrs. Stevens had left Janet’s room he went in and sat at her bedside. “Sweetheart, since we never considered having anything but a boy … don’t misunderstand, I couldn’t be more pleased, but we never thought about a girl’s name.”

  “You’re right, dear, but I did, just in case.”

  “Oh? Well … ?”

  “If it’s okay with you, I’d love to name her after my grandmother.”

  “That’s who you were named after. You suggesting Janet Junior?”

  She laughed. “No, Bill. My grandmother had more than one name. Janet seemed more appropriate for Wichita, Kansas. But her real name was Nicole Jeanette Antoinette Buchart.”

  “You mean you’re going to put all that on one little helpless baby?”

  “No, of course not. Just Nicole. Would you like that?”

  Nicole … Would they call her Nikki … or Nicky … or Nick? No, he’d insist on Nicole. No nicknames. Nicole McNeil, Nicole McNeil … “I think it’s beautiful, honey.”

  “You’re not just saying that—?”

  “No, I love it. And you too, mother of Nicole McNeil.”

  Four days later, when he drove his wife and daughter home from the hospital, the baby had changed so much he couldn’t quite believe it. She was adorable, Nicole McNeil, and any disappointment had long since evaporated.

  When they arrived at the apartment the nurse was waiting and took charge immediately, bu
t Janet was so eager to take over that the woman was paid for her two weeks and let go after a few days.

  Motherhood, as the song said, was what came naturally to Janet, but fatherhood kept Bill in a state of high anxiety. When the bassinet was brought into the bedroom it was put on his side of the king-sized bed. He’d insisted. He slept hardly at all, listening to the baby’s breathing, and he often woke with a start and got out of bed to check that the baby’s covers were in place.

  He became convinced that Dr. Spock was a sadist. Whoever heard of feeding a child on schedule—two, four and six? It hurt him to hear those hungry cries. His sisters had breast-fed their children on demand, but Janet was firm about following the pediatrician’s instructions. She believed with Spock that even babies had to begin to learn that the world wasn’t altogether their oyster. They had to learn to begin to take some frustrations to grow up into healthy human beings. You could coddle and smother to death in the name of love but out of self-indulgence. Like Violet with Bill …

  One night Bill was so upset he held Nicole consolingly, pacing the floor with her in his arms and rocking her.

  “To hell with the rules, this is cruelty.” Holding her close, very close. With the baby in his arms, he went to the kitchen and heated the bottle. He was getting really good at this, he thought. Had his own father had a chance to do this? No, probably not, everything considered.

  As the baby sucked contentedly, he brought her back to the bedroom and sat in the chair with her as she drained the two ounces. He burped her, then watched as she fell asleep in the crook of his arm. He put her down carefully, then got into bed.

  Janet watched him closely. This was the man who had once rejected the idea of having a child? He’d certainly reversed his tracks. He phoned two or three times a day to see if everything was “going all right,” came home early from the office in time to see the baby have her six-o’clock feeding. He chickened out on bathing her, afraid she would be too slippery with soap suds to handle, but stood by and watched as Janet took over. Watched, or supervised?

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  BY THE TIME NICOLE was six weeks old, Bill was a more relaxed father. But what worried him now was the way they were living. Janet’s days were full from early morning to evening and she was doing the best she could in their cramped quarters, but there was no denying that the apartment was beginning to look like a Chinese laundry. The bathroom was cluttered with diapers, and the bathinette left almost no room to turn around in. Clothing was strewn over the bathroom towel bars and over the three collapsible wooden racks that stood in the dining room in front of the sliding doors. He was happy that Janet wasn’t complaining, of course. But even so, this couldn’t go on much longer, and going to his mother’s for the summer was no solution. It wasn’t even a reprieve, except for Harriet and Gordon.